One great thing about blowguns…
...ugh... Fucking auto-correct… let me start again.
One great thing about BLOGGING is going every now and then and checking the stats for your blog. How many people have visited in the past week, how did they link to the site, etc.
I say it is great, often it is a little depressing, especially when the numbers go down, but that never happens to this blog…
But one of the best parts about the stats page is that it shows you google searches that eventually resulted in the searcher arriving at your blog. More often then not these are searches like "whyihateeverybody blog" or "that really funny, awesome blog".
Every now and then, however, you find some truly amazing searches. I have gathered my three favorite below, these are 100% real searches that brought people to this very blog.
"Eating chocolate cake"
Somebody was interested, not in baking chocolate cake, nor buying chocolate cake, but EATING chocolate cake. For some reason they wanted to see footage and/or read about people EATING chocolate cake. Some people have weird fetishes out there. Luckily they get linked to my blog.
"i hate everyone rainbow"
There is something extremely poetic about this. Without any punctuation it is impossible to tell what this person was actually Googling, but I like to think that, as he or she was furiously typing "I HATE EVERYONE" into their search bar, they suddenly saw a rainbow, and were struck by how beautiful it was, and put down the gun… and got linked to my blog.
"whore phone numbers"
Oooooooo… somebody was DISAPPOINTED by their Google search!
Keep Googling, weirdos!